Even True Love Hurts.

In one hand I am saddened that I will never be with my first true love then on the other hand I am glad about it. I realized that finding love is one of the best things that can happen to a soul but at the same time that love when reciprocated as obsessions becomes a bag of hurt. I was lucky to find my first true love quite early and I enjoyed every bit of the early times, it was pure fun.
The long road trips to meet him, his handsomeness and my willingness to show him to my world, the adventure and to top it all the sex. Sex was something else, on the rocks in Kaduna to the beach in Lagos, it was heavenly. He was always willing to show me to his friends and I was just a shy young woman who was super content with what she had.
He was my ideal boyfriend, he was in tune with what I wanted out of life and gave his complete support, most times he comes up with brilliant ideas and we do things concerning my ambitions together, he was the best but he was also short fused. He easily gets angry at his friends and exhibits some violent instinct though not towards me so I didn’t care. Then one day I had to come to Lagos from Abuja for an audition, he was aware and in full support.
After auditions a friend invited me to see a movie and since I hadn’t been to the cinema before I gladly joined him. He dropped me off at my boyfriend’s house that night and I ran in with excitement to give him details of the fun I had but I was greeted with a stern face and loud demands of where I had been. I saw a different being; I was scared because no one knew I was I Lagos, not even my sister so I had to be cautious. I tried to explain but it was like I was spitting fuel that only increased the fire. That day I saw the rage of obsessive possession over me.
I had never seen him that way before, so pained. And as I opened my mouth to speak it landed, a slap on my face. A face with eyes that were already filled with tears as I tried to calm him because I never meant to upset him. That slap changed the course of everything.
When I look back at the events in my life I feel blessed for not continuing in that love because truth be told I would have been a completely battered woman by now.
Today I have chosen not to waste my thought over the hands that once hit me but to focus on the heart that can never ever conceive such a thought.
I couldn’t have survived this long with all that drama.


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